Monday, December 27, 2004
~ 1:41 AM ~
Felt quite weird when i left home for hall today.. the feeling of sadness.. away from home for another wk again.. it's been like this for the past 5 mths.. i thought i would have gotten used to it but i guessed not..
Is it because i spent too much time away from home?
I used to long for the time when i can go out always n enjoy, have fun.. but now i appreciate the joy of staying at home.. hahas.. can slack my time away.. tv, magazines.. or even simply chatting non-stop wif my siblings n disturbing them! heh~! n the great food my parents will prepare for me when i am back home.. hahas.. i am a pampered gal~! =P although i've never tell them how touched i felt sometimes by their actions.. haiz..
Oh no.. too much time in hall.. i miss home.. =(
*sometimes i wish u could juz leave me alone
Saturday, December 25, 2004
~ 2:22 PM ~
Got the extract below while i was blog-surfing.. makes quite a lot of sense.. take some time to read n think abt it.. =)
If you find yourself in love wif someone who does not love you,
Be gentle with yourself..
There is nothing wrong with you..
Love just didnt choose to rest in the other person's heart..
If you find someone else in love with you and you don't love him/her,
Feel honoured that love came & called at your door,
But gently refused the gift that you cannot return.
Do not take advantage. Do not cause pain.
How you deal with love is how you deal with you,
And all our hearts feel the same pains & joys,
Even if our lives & ways are different.
If you fall in love with another, and he/she falls in love with you,
and then love chooses to leave...
Do not try to assess it or reclaim blame.. Let it go..
There is a reason and there is a meaning..
You will know in time..
Remember that you don't choose love..
Love chooses you.
All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life..
Feel the way it fills you to overflowing..
Then reach out and give it away..
Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you..
Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit
Give it to the world around you in anyway you can..
This is where many lovers go wrong..
Having been so long without love,
They understand love only as a need..
They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love.
And they begin to look at love as something
That flows to them rather than from them..
The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing,
but as their love cools, they revert to seeing their love as need..
They cease to be someone who generates love &
instead becomes someone who seeks love.
They forget that the secret for love is that it is a gift,
and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away..
Remember this & keep it to your heart..
Love has its own time.. its own season.. and its own reason for coming & going..
You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into staying..
You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you..
But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover,
There is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do.
Love always has been and always will be a mystery.
Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life..
Friday, December 24, 2004
~ 1:09 PM ~
Look at me
You may think you see who I really am
But you'll never know me
Everyday it's as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside
I am now
In a world where I have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow
I will show the world what's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me
Why is my reflection someone I don't know
Must I pretend that I'm
Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside
There's a heart that must be free to fly
That burns with a need to know the reason why
Why must we all conceal
What we think How we feel
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide
I won't pretend that I'm
Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside
How true this lyrics sounds.. hahas.. I guess many pple do not mean to put on a mask.. They are forced to under circumstances... *sadly* Some are afraid of letting their closed ones worry.. Some think it's unfair to let others 'experience' ur sadness.. Others are juz bound by their environment..
I hate the feeling of wearing one.. It's tiring.. It makes me feel so much worse later.. the reasons go on n on.. As a result, my emotions are practically 'plastered' on my face.. hahas.. Sorry pple! Guess u guys have endured quite abit too.. heh~! I am getting more temperamental recently.. argh! Not good.. not good..
Trying not to let my feelings control how I think.. but sometimes... it's really hard.. Think I have the natural AP face oso.. esp when I am tired.. nth is bothering me actually.. juz tired dat's why i look sian.. but i make my frens worry for nth! haha.. oops!
A mask hides ur true feelings from others.. but not urself..
hahas.. I still have this mentality.. Why deceive urself n others rite? heh~! Anyway it's Xmas Eve today.. so decided to blog some of my reflections here as i think thru some stuff.. hahas.. enuf of crapping liao.. i am gg to enjoy my Xmas Eve today n pple out there, enjoy urs too! Merry Xmas~!
Monday, December 20, 2004
~ 1:53 PM ~
Totally bored rite now.. waiting for sms to tell me wat time shld meet n go back hall.. hahas.. came across this on a fren's blog:
1.wads ur hp: Sony Ericsson T610.. Have always wanted my K700i though.. heh~!
2.wads ur fav feature on face: hmm.. my eyes? hahahas..
3.wads ur fav song: Erm.. depends lehz.. but usually those lovey-dovey n sad ballads.. hahas..
4.do u haf a bf/gf: hahas.. enjoying being single now? =P
5.do u haf ur own room: er.. nope~!
6.hates: creepy crawlies.. beany vegetables.. hahas.. i think the list will go on n on depending on my mood eh?
7.wad u doin nw: answering on these funny ques to waste my time away?
8.wads 1 thing u cant live w/o: my hp..
9.where do u live: amk
10.what would u do when sum1 tells u he likes u: hmm.. i guess it depends.. but if he's those i know i confirm wldnt like in the future.. probably tell him he shld move on? hahahs..
11.hw r u feeling nw: bored.. if not why am i doing this? hahahs.
12.where do u hangout: town's my fav place even though it gets really sian at times.. hee!
13.wad r u gd at: erm.. i shld start thinking.. hahas..
14.wad is it abt a person u cant stand: Dishonest.. Possessive..
15.wad do u wan rite now: hmm.. maybe juz a bit more time to spend wif pple i wan to be wif..
16.wad's a word tt describe u: silly.. hahahas..
17.wads ur dream: hahas.. i think dat's my cedar clique's common dream lorz - be a tai tai.. everyday play mahjong.. shop at Tangs.. have high tea.. wahahas.. really high maintenance gals.. =P anyway being in accountancy.. i think my career is quite mapped out le?
18:day or nite: night.. =)
19:sunset or sunrise: sunrise.. hopefully the beginning of a bright n cheery day?
20:do u like a romantic stead: of course~!
21:wad izzit abt the opposite gender tt attracts u: Decisive.. Caring.. hmm.. to me, it's more of 'chemistry'? hahas.. i still believe in alot of dat..
22:r u an independent person: hahas.. notz! i seldom make decisions.. unless in really pek cek situations.. hahas.. i dun like doing things alone n wun do them alone.. n i am dependent on my frens to put some sense into me sometimes.. hahas..
23.do u like sch: hahas.. for the fun part.. yesh!
24.r u a ctrl freak: hmm.. maybe..
25.r u naive: again.. i guess sometimes it's a yesh.. or shld i say ignorant? hahas..
26.do u believe in god: yes
27:wad'll u do if u c ur bf/gf hugging a gal/boy: if they are juz frens n it's for a reason.. why notz? hahas.. unless not the above, probably confront him? hahas..
28.believe in fate: yeah~!
29.get pissed off easily: hahahas.. this is a definite 'yesh' ans.. especially towards certain situations.. heh~!
30.like ur parent(s): duh~!
31.r u a materialistic person: er.. i guess it's another yesh.. not a huge extent though.. hahas.. =P
32.believe in love: yah!
33.hw many piercings do u haf: sadly.. only 2.. 1 on each ear hole.. i wan 1 more ear hole! hahas..
34.will u get a tattoo: no!
35.smoke: nope!
36.clubbing: ok lah..
37.will u forgive ur bf/gf if he cheats on u: er.. no! I believe if there's a 1st time in this.. there will be another? cant keep forgiving rite.. hahas..
38.will u expect ur bf/gf to forgive u if u cheats on him/her: of course not~!
39.r u on a trip recently: my JB trip? hahas..
40:favourite country: can i state the whole continent instead? hahas.. Europe!! my dream place..
41.r u impatient: sometimes..
42.which brands do u prefer: 37 Degrees.. OP.. Swatch.. hmm.. is Pepper Plus a brand? hahas..
43.do you organise parties often: nope~!
44.do u haf gd frens: duh~!
45.do u think u r gd looking: hahas.. ok lah..
46.do u care abt looks: yupz~!
47.do u use vulgarities: hahas.. i guess notz.. or does the word 'wu gui' which i always use constitutes as vulgarity?
48.do u quarrel wif pple easily: surprising nope!
49.r u forgiving: gimme some time to think things thru.. n yesh!
50.do u get hurt easily: hmm.. sometimes..
51.do u prefer guys wif long/short hair: short!
52.do u prefer girls wif long/short hair: no preference..
53.is ur hair colored: yupz! brown highlights.. speaking of dat.. i wan dye my hair soon soon!!
54.r u a romantic partner: ask my future partner nx time? wahahas..
55.do u wear a watch: yupz.. feels weird without it..
56.wad color clothes do u like: pink, black, white
57.will u chose love or $: hahas.. can i be greedy n take both?
58.do u prefer slp or eat: eat!! hahas.. i am piggy..
59.white or black: white
60.pink or red: pink
61.fav flower: sunflower.. hahas.. weird rite?
62.do u like to receive flowers: haha.. yah..
63.do u haf more den 10 pair of shoes: nope! i will control wat i spend one.. hahahas..
Wow.. finally done wif this.. cant imagine wat i am doing.. hahas.. alone at home now really bored.. no bro for me to disturb.. sis for me to talk crap wif.. hahas.. anyway gg back hall soon.. tata~!
Sunday, December 19, 2004
~ 1:12 AM ~
hahas.. i bet the cheerleading guys are not gg to be very happy when they see this title of mine! hee.. went Orchard wif Elaine for yet another shopping trip.. this time i got wat i wanted.. my new jeans n black tube top.. hahas.. den took this really cool City Buzz to Suntec.. cost $1 a trip n it brings u to all the landmark places in S'pore.. the different hotels, shopping malls ard town.. hahas.. n we got this bottle of free honey! =P reached Suntec n saw this mega Best Food Fair there.. wah.. we went ard buying n eating as if we didnt have meals earlier on! hahahas.. had fun again today wif one of my best shopping 'kakis'.. hahas.. now dat she's staying so near to me.. guess much easier to meet up for our shopping sprees.. hahas.. at this rate, we are living a 'tai tai' lifestyle even b4 we start working.. oops! like wat shan always says.. 'we are high-maintenance' gals.. agree pple? wahahas~!
Wanted to watch my movie on the laptop earlier on.. again it left me wif this msg 'Error downloading Codec'.. argh! wat's the prob?? Den after i reformatted it, got no more batt to watch le.. haiz.. this blur queen here brought home her laptop without plug n batt.. the biggest joke of my wk!! soon no one will be able to 'qie' my blurness.. =P
Yeah! Sis coming back home from Taiwan tml.. hahas.. Really missed her.. She gave me a shock ytd wif an sms dat says she's in hospital.. luckily her food poisoning aint dat serious.. heh~! Looking forward to tml... =)
Friday, December 17, 2004
~ 2:05 PM ~
Guess ytd's the happiest day of my wk so far? hahas.. finally went JB wif shan, Hong Seng n Gary after wat seems like yrs of planning.. heh! Did major shopping there.. Bought a new pair of blue sneakers, bag n skirt.. n all in total cost less than $50.. wahahas! i am turning into shopping queen soon.. consider dat i will be hitting town wif Elaine again tml.. =P
Food there was great too.. had cereal crayfish for the 1st time in my life! hahas.. A definite must-go next time to try out good food.. =)
Realise Johor is so much like S'pore.. City Square feels like Wisma Atria.. Holiday Inn feels like Lucky Plaza? hahahas.. Except for the better food n cheaper clothes there? Oops! Have been going to Malaysia every yr ever since i was born but never have I actually walked around in Johor.. Hmm.. felt quite sua ku ytd among the 4 of us.. hahahas~! But still I enjoyed myself..
Just checked my results oso.. ok lah.. pretty much wat I had expected.. hahas.. econs never da bao.. phew! Or else I am seriously gg to tell everyone I am not an econs student in JC.. hahahs.. glad I can finally stay away from dat subject yeah.. hee!
Okies.. gg out to watch National Treasure soon... uploaded a few pics frm JB below.. the rest think shan has them in her blog.. hahahas.. yupz.. enjoy!
~ 1:42 PM ~
The place wif cereal crayfish - A must eat!! The cereal alone is enuf to make ur mouth water.. hahahas.. muz ask my Daddy to try cooking some day.. heh~! 
~ 1:36 PM ~
At City Square.. b4 our major shopping.. hahas..
~ 12:01 PM ~
Our 1st stop in JB.. Fried Kway Teow n Pig Trotters~!! yUmmY!
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
~ 3:15 AM ~
hmm.. guess i was tempted by many pple.. finally decided to make a blog.. hahas~! shun bian help me kill some time when i online oso.. besides chatting.. heh~! this blog took me like 3 days for it to be officially published.. n in the process i realised quite a few things:
1. Is it me? Or is it HTML's fault? hahas.. my HTML totally cant make it.. for the whole of Sat nite.. i'm trying so hard to figure out wat all the weird stuff means... how to edit them.. hahas.. in the end.. i sort of gave up.. now i finally know why during my IT lessons, they always say HTML's hard to understand.. hahas.. so it's not totally my fault dat it took me 3 days? heh~!
2. I am a demanding gal.. hahas.. ask me wat i did to my cousin on Sat.. no one will dare say i am not ye3 man2.. hahas.. oops~! n i so purposely put dat as a question in my msn nick.. although shan n Hong Seng both said my ques is an obvious YES ans.. thanx pple for ur very frank replies.. hahas.. muz try not to be lydat liao.. heh~! oh yah... thanx to my little cousin oso.. helping me wif all my weirdo requirements.. even though eventually we didnt manage to use dat template.. meaning u wasted ur time trying to figure out all my requests.. hahaha.. budden ur HTML really zai lorz.. impress me!
haha.. my 1st entry looks long.. brain cant processed liao.. had a tiring day today from cheerleading n bridge.. n for the 1st time i actually enjoyed bridge more.. hee! okies.. think i better stop crapping.. shall keep ya updated wif more frequent posts? hahas~!
